Purposeful Parent Tip: Be grateful for the year that passed and dream big for the year ahead.
Happy New Year! You made it through the holidays and now you have a brand new year in front of you. What is it going to look like? On New Year’s Eve morning, my children and I sat down and listed all of the things we were grateful for in 2012 and we planned ahead for what we wanted 2013 to be.
While I did provide overall instructions for the activity, I did not tell them what to write. I didn’t want to influence their choices of what they were grateful for nor dictate what they should strive for in the coming year. When we were finished, we each read from our respective lists.
I was amazed at what they wrote. They were grateful for so much more than I thought they would be AND for things I didn’t think meant that much. Their goals for 2013 equally surprised me as they included things like being nicer to each other (and me!) and doing well in school and sports.
Simple things you might say, but that was the beauty of it. Nothing lofty or unattainable for their goals as well as nothing petty for what they were grateful for. (Ok ok. My son WAS grateful for his new flat screen TV but he DID pay for it himself with his summer job, so it still counts!)
Both of my kids said what a fun activity it was and wanted to continue it each year.
Afterwards, they went into their rooms and placed the 2013 goals list in their rooms in a prominent place where they’d see it easily. I explained to them that goals that are written down and viewed regularly have a much higher chance of coming to fruition than if they are simply stated in our heads.
It was a great exercise for me as well. Normally I am a grateful person – expressing my thanks every day for all of my blessings. As I reviewed my list of things I was grateful for in 2012, there was not the typical list of accomplishments or accolades as in year’s past. Hmmm… so then what did I DO in 2012?
Well, if I compare 2012 to other years, it was somewhat devoid of big projects or activities. It was more of a collection of baby steps as I transitioned from my retail activities with my baby gift busines, Frittabello, to The Purposeful Parent. It was a year of learning, reflection, meeting new people, and trying new things as I stepped into this new role of mentoring and advising parents of the importance of their parenting journey. Wow.
This was a revelation to me. I’m a “do-er” and to not see a long list of accomplishments was a bit disconcerting. I had to reflect on the year in a whole new way and realize that just “be-ing” in the year to allow myself the opportunity to change focus, learn new things was just as important as awards and recognition. Perhaps even more.
In fact, this was confirmed when I read my One Minute Bible Study daily email on January 1, 2013. Instead of the focus of “what will you do in 2013?”, its message was “who do you want to be in 2013?”
As I meditated on that message and then looked at my 2013 goals, it was amazing that they were very different than in year’s past. I noticed that my goals were not so much about doing and accomplishing but rather working on who I am as a person, a mother, a daughter, and yes, as The Purposeful Parent.
Funny what a year of focusing on being instead of doing can do!
What’s 2013 look like for you? Do you need to re-calibrate your goals to focus more on the INTERNAL you rather than the EXTERNAL? Take a moment or two to think about the kind of person you want to become this year. Share this with friends and family, and yes, your children. There’s no one better to hold you accountable to your goals!