Purposeful Parent Tip: Showing your emotions to your child in moderation is critical to their development of empathy and compassion for others.

Last night I watched The Voice coaches and contestants pay tribute to the victims of the Newtown CT shooting. Tears welled up in my eyes and gently fell down my face. My daughter walked in, saw me crying and said, “Mommy, why do you keep watching this stuff? It just makes you cry.” I told her that these tears are different.

The tears shed last night were not of sorrow or grief, but of joy and connectedness and love. We have all started to witness the stunning tributes to these angels and heroes and it moves me deep in my spirit. It reminds me that we truly are a loving people and when times are bad, we do come out to help and support each other. We’re still seeing and hearing about the acts of kindness from Hurricane Sandy and it is amazing.

I told my daughter that these tributes, this outpouring, this love is what we need to focus on now. Other than when it first happened, I have not watched any news programs about this event. I don’t want to know any more details. I don’t want to know what was on the shooter’s computer. I don’t want to know how he got into the school or why there were guns in his home that he shared with his mother.

I’m not being naïve or ignoring things that could very well prevent this from happening again, but I want to focus on the families. I want us to continue to bask in this love-fest we have for people we’ve never met but somehow we relate to on a very basic level.

I want them to feel my virtual hugs. I want them to know how deeply sorry I am for their loss. I want them to know I am praying for them every day. I want them to know they are loved.

That’s what they need now. They need our love. For it is this love that we are sending that will change hearts.  As a parent you know this. You know that when your child is in the midst of a meltdown, a big bear hug calms him or her, letting them know they are safe and loved.

Sending big bear hugs to all the families affected by this tragedy. You are safe and you are loved.