Purposeful Parent Tip: Embrace Your Own Parenting Style

For many people here in the Northeast, Hurricane Sandy wreaked havoc not only on property and possessions but on routines and schedules. People with no power found themselves going to bed earlier. Those without access to gas had to wait in long lines to fill up tanks and containers to run their generators. School closings sent kids into a state of utter boredom or worse yet, sent parents into their own state of emergency as they struggled to keep kids entertained.

In my own home, we were blessed to have not lost power so for the most part, things hummed along as usual…except my kids were home 24/7 for nearly 10 days straight. To say this time was interesting is an understatement.

My studious daughter kept herself busy with school projects and daily reading. She even spent a day re-arranging her room and clearing out some clutter. My son spent most of his time watching basketball as the NBA season got underway. Both were very happy…for a while.

After several days, the boredom set in and with many roads in our town not cleared, I was hesitant to venture out too far. Plus I still had work to do and projects to complete, so my time was not as free as my children’s.

I’ve said this many times in other blog posts…I am not what you’d call a “creative mom”. You know what I’m talking about, right? These are the moms who, when stuck inside for days with their kids, can dream up the most crafty projects, bake cookies, or devise some other inspiring activity that keeps kids (and moms) from losing their minds.

This is not me.

I was not built to be a stay-at-home mom. Stay-at-home moms are cut from a different cloth. They were given an extra dose of patience, creativity, and finesse in their DNA – plain and simple.

I realized I did not have what it takes to be a stay-at-home mom early into my son’s life. Having been home with him for several days, I ran out of things to do in the first hour. I needed more and I don’t feel bad or guilty about admitting that. There are many who think differently – that all moms should be tethered to their homes and kids and be happy. Isn’t this why they became mothers?

I say no. I did not become a mother so that my children and I could spend endless hours making crafts or baking or visiting every museum or park known to man. I applaud those who can. I have friends who are stay at home moms and I marvel at them. They have an endless supply of ideas and activities to enrich their children’s lives and there are times, yes, that I’m a bit envious. Are their kids going to be better prepared for the world than mine because they’ve been exposed to so much? Have I done my kids a disservice?

No. I would’ve done my kids a disservice had I stayed home and tried to be something I’m not.

These last days during the storm and its recovery, my kids and I talked, joked, played cards, and watched a TV show now and then. We raked up the billions of leaves so graciously given to us by my neighbors, we argued, we made up, and we pulled through. Were they bored at times? Yup. Was I bored at times? Yup. Did we survive? You betcha.

My hat goes off to all of the moms who during this storm were able to entertain their children and prevent near-blindness from too much TV or video-game playing. While I do not wish for another storm like Hurricane Sandy, if one is in the forecast, then I’m opening up my home to all those crafty moms out there who expertly ride out these storms with a lot more finesse than me.

While we may all experience our own parenting state of emergency now and then, the trick is to be prepared and to know that this too will pass.